After months of mental preparation, countless hours setting up a nursery, and several lighthearted arguments over the perfect name, the big day is finally here. You are finally about to make that sudden transition from an expectant father to, well, an actual father. Now what? This article covers some topics I wish I had been more prepared for and some that hadn’t crossed my mind before the big day.
Table of Contents
How To Prepare For The Trip To The Hospital
I cannot stress this enough, the most important step in preparing for the big day is making sure you have anything and everything you might need to be prepped and ready to go. I couldn’t imagine a worse way to kick off what should be considered one of the best days of your life than scrambling to find the insurance card your wife had asked you to find weeks ago. Remember, due dates are just best guesses, and nothing says your beautiful bundle of joy can’t come much earlier than anticipated.
As for my wife and I, we had packed our bugout bag well in advance of our due date because we knew when it came time, we were going to be ready and out the door as quickly as possible; see our comprehensive list of what we considered to be the essentials here. Your bugout bag doesn’t need to be anything fancy, and it doesn’t need to be overly large. To be completely honest, we didn’t end up using half of what was packed, but it’s better to have all of the essentials packed just in case.
Another really important thing to be on top of is understanding where the hospital is, how to get to the hospital, and where to park. I know these might sound like really obvious suggestions but trust me, your significant other will be less than thrilled if you ask her how to get there while she is having contractions. Concerning parking, not every hospital will have a place for you to pull up and unload your pregnant wife. In this case, you’ll want to be sure you know exactly where to park so you won’t waste any additional time. Similar to this point, it is helpful to do a bit of reconnaissance of the hospital you plan to have your baby delivered ahead of time. Understanding which is the appropriate entrance for you and where the delivery room and maternity ward are can make a huge difference when navigating the hospital.
Hospital Tips And Tricks
Remember to breathe.
The most fundamental thing you need to do while your child is being born is to remain cool, calm, and collected for your significant other, who is undoubtedly going through an intense experience that you yourself will never have to deal with that. Honestly, women are superheroes, and don’t forget that! As your wife is getting ready to deliver your child, be there for her, it’s just that simple. Please don’t make the day about you because, honestly, it isn’t. If your significant other needs something, don’t hesitate to get it for her. If she has questions that she is too nervous to ask, you need to step up and ask them for her, be her rock.
Be attentive and involved.
You have the privilege of witnessing the miracle of life in real-time, appreciate what a unique experience this is. It’s easy to get distracted nowadays with the plethora of pocket-sized devices readily available, but this isn’t one of those times it’s acceptable for you to be checking emails or texting with friends. It would help if you focused on supporting and encouraging your significant other first, and second, making sure you take in what is happening around you. Make those memories because you will never have the chance to experience your first child being born again.
Don’t be afraid to ask questions.
Okay, so I would probably advise against asking questions while your significant other delivers your baby unless it’s completely relevant. However, after the fact, feel to rifle them off to the nurses as they come up. That’s what they are there for. While in the recovery room, you will be visited frequently by all sorts of medical professionals. At that time, it is entirely appropriate to ask any questions you might have about the process, aftercare, or otherwise. I must have asked the nurses a few dozen questions while my wife was recovering. Everything from how to properly swaddle my son to “oh my god,” what is this sticky black stuff in his diaper? Is there something wrong with him? It’s meconium, and there isn’t anything wrong with your baby.
How To Cope The First Night As A Father
It’s funny, really, how we as men don’t internalize the full scope of the pregnancy because, even though we are active in the pregnancy, we are never actually pregnant. At least, this is how it was for me. I reveled in the fact that I could tell anyone and everyone that I spoke with my wife was pregnant and that I would be a father soon. Still, I never actually digested what that meant until the moment came when I did become a father. That was a moment that I will never forget.
It was the middle of the night on that first night when my son was born. We were all alone in my wife’s recovery room, and the endorphins from the day began to wane when the reality of the situation set in. It hit me hard. I remember a sudden onset of tightness in my chess coupled with a bout of difficulty breathing as I experienced the first panic attack of my adult life. I don’t even remember having been worried about anything at the time, but it hit me subconsciously nonetheless, I was going to have to care for a child. The funny thing is our son had been planned for a very, very long time, and I still couldn’t comprehend what exactly being a father meant for me until that very moment.
If you find yourself experiencing something similar, my advice is to, once again, just breathe. You will be a damn good father, and your child will love you unconditionally; that is all that matters in this world. Just keep repeating that to yourself, and you will be fine. The reality is that parenting is equal parts challenging and rewarding but what you are reacting to at this very moment is change. Change can often be uncomfortable and difficult, and a fear of the unknown is a valid reason to be anxious, but you got this! You need to stay strong for yourself, your significant other, and your new beautiful baby.
How To Win Big With Your Signifcant Other
Commemorate the occasion. Look, your significant other likely went through hell and back to give you the most amazing gift you will ever receive in your life, so the least you can do is try and return the favor. My son was born on May 19th, so I decided to get my wife emerald earrings because it has our son’s birthstones in them. Whenever she wears them, she will be reminded of our son and the day he was born. Doing this won’t necessarily make her day any more special. Still, this small gesture will go a long way and give her something to have that will always remind her of your and your new precious baby.